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Tuesday, February 10, 2004

Heart failure...the Atkins way!

Millions of dieting Americans choked on their blocks of cheese today as it was revealed that Dr. Robert Atkins, founder of his namesake high-protein diet, died a bloated mess. Weighing in at a hefty 258 pounds, Dr. Atkins had a history of hypertension and suffered a heart attack and congestive heart failure. His wife claims all this came about not due to his diet, but rather a "viral infection." I didn't realize that we were referring to steak and heavy cream as a "viral infection" these days.


I'll be the first one to admit that, as a short-term fix, the Atkins diet works. I lost 20 pounds in little over a month and a half. Of course, during that time I would have killed someone for a glass of orange juice. Long-term, that just isn't a healthy way to live. The only sure way to lose weight and keep it off: sensible eating and exercise. The problem is that it requires discipline and self-control, two things lacking in modern society. So we get these extreme diets, some of them direct opposites, and a deluge of pills that do absolutely nothing but get you hopped up on caffeine. Which is why we are far and away the "fattest" nation on Earth.

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